Do you ever wonder if other people think the same way you do? For example, I make up names for people that I see on a regular basis, but don't know personally. At my office, we have a communal women's bathroom for the entire 5th floor and so I run into women from the other companies fairly regularly. So I often see Ugly-Hair Woman, Smells-Like-Smoke Lady, and Miss That-Butt-Must-Belong-To-A-Secretary. But there's one woman in particular I'm thinking of...Elephant Feet. I've only ever seen her feet in the stall next to me, and they are painfully swollen, large feet. How can I tell? She wears flip-flops. Even in the dead of winter when it's freezing outside.

Now, I've never actually seen her face, and I honestly hope I never will. Because I've assigned her this name in my head I don't think I could look at her eye to eye without blushing. I actually once fled the bathroom because her stall opened as I was washing my hands. But maybe I could face her. Maybe she's got some bizarre name for me in her head. Like...Scuffy Black Shoe Girl.